Monday 26 April 2010

Making 'Permissions' work for us

This is a great cartoon. It's the exception that proves the rule! Much of the world of today is tied up with rules and OUGHTS and HAVE TO's. I had a great English Teacher (called John Flanagan) and he gave us some neat definitions. This one remained: 'Freedom is the right to do as we ought'. You may or may not agree with the definition, that's immaterial. It does however imply 2 things. We have Choices and within that we also have Responsibilities. Therein for me, lies the understanding of Permissions. The cartoon is powerful because it portrays using parody how needless both of these positions are. If either party took responsibility for their OWN actions they would make good and adult choices. A Coaching colleague of mine (called Jackie Hogan) gave me a great way of validating my own behaviour and also a way of deciding what to do in any given situation.

Next time you're in a 'will I won't I' type of situation, ask yourself this powerful question:
"What's appropriate here..?"
Then leave a gap of 5/10 seconds and see what comes back. That usually is the correct answer. I find it works for me and many others I've offered it to have given me similar feedback. The reason why is it invites us into an ADULT space where we can have an adult conversation with...OURSELVES. Can you see how powerful and how simple this is?
If it does not work, don't worry I'll do a post on guilt and forgiveness at some point!

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